Bad (bad), Bad (bad)!

I would first like to point out that all of these names are from today’s birth notices in the Announcements section of one Australian newspaper group. One day, one set of papers. Remarkable.

Harrison Leroy Brown. Yes, ha ha, parents, very funny. Speaking from the personal experience of someone who’s surname is shared with that of a prominent 1960s television family with a catchy theme song featuring the name, I can tell you now that your new son will absolutely never ever tire of people pointing out that he’s the baddest man in the whole damn town.

Jaxon Bruce. Not a lot of room to move there.

Kiarnah. A girl.

Orion. A boy.

Jaspa. Jasper is one of those names which has had a renaissance in the last few years, and while I personally don’t like it, I know several people who have used it and I have no objection because it’s an actual name. Unless, of course, it’s spelt Jaspa.

Reebie Alice. Not even going to contemplate the reasons for this one.

Taylah Madisyn. You would have thought that with a Mum named Mikylah, daughter would have stood a fair chance of a decent name with a proper spelling. But no, apparently the “y” is in the genes.

Tully Jayne. An over-fondness for the North Queensland town? Nope? Then I have no idea.

Etienne Quyen Quyen [Surname]. Several things to note here. First, the baby is a girl. Second, both parents have completely normal, completely Anglo first and surnames. Third, despite sounding pretty and being an actual name, Etienne is a boy's name the last time I checked. And finally, why on earth would you choose two middle names that are exactly the same and mean “bird” in Vietnamese? Stephen Bird Bird [Surname]. Nice, parents, nice.